A proverb goes: ‘A joy shared, is a joy doubled. A sorrow shared, is a sorrow halfed.’ Undoubtedly, it is a true saying, or else, it would not be a proverb! 😁
But, I sometimes differ on this proverb. Especially, on the ‘sorrow’ part. Sometimes, I feel that when a sorrow is shared, it actually gets doubled in stead of getting halfed. From my point of view, it is better to ignore, or forget the sorrow. And, it is best to eliminate the sorrow solving up the root issues.
Most of the sorrows are generated from the real life troubles, failures, relationship complications etc. It is by nature cruel, and destructive. It is never healthy to keep sorrow burdened in the heart. That is why, it is said to speak out the sorrow to unburden the heart. But, sometimes, in the process of unburdening the heart, we actually nurture, and ponder over the sorrow items too much. The more we talk, and think about it, the more the reasons of the sorrows get pinned down in our brains, and hearts. From this rages, revengefulness, envies, frustrations, hopelessness etc. can born. These new negativities eventually kill our time, peace, energy, dream, enthusiasm to move forward. In stead of solving out the main reasons, we keep playing, and pampering on our sulking emotions that bar us to think logically, and calmly to take the next steps. That is why, I think it is good trying to ignore, or forget the sorrow (but, never forget to learn the lessons from the sorrow!) to avoid other negativities in life. If the reasons of the sorrow seem a larger hindrance for future, it is better to concentrate on the whole thing to find a way out. But, still, I will say that even in this situation you better do not share. Sharing with other mind, or too many minds may risk your focus to be distracted.
Another problem of sharing sorrow is letting other know your weak, and fragile points. And, if you do not know your true friends unfortunately, you are actually making the sharing a fatal blow for your future. My opinion is that if you are a struggler, be a struggler with dignity. Whatever disastrous the sorrow is, try to fight it alone keeping your head up. Once you win a battle alone, you will get a huge confidence for future battles.
Also, in sharing you will never know when, and how who will be getting cynical, and judgmental on you willingly, or non-willingly. This may become the salt in your injury. Again, sharing can increase your tendency of depending on others too. It harms you doubly : first of all, you will be losing your confidence, tolerance, and decision-making power, and secondly, if next time you do not get any support you will be losing control over you, will be getting restlessness, and collapsing badly out of depression. So, it is always wise to be in the practice of dealing one’s own situation alone.
I am not all in all against of sharing sorrows. You must be sharing pains with your trusted ones, and getting helps, and opinions from your prudent friends in your sorrows, but before getting any help from others, at least for once, try to fight with your sorrows alone as long as possible with full-fledged courage, and positivity.
Wish you the victory over sorrow that is fought alone.