02 JUNE 2015, 20:56
My mind is extremely restless for last few days. I have lost the peace, and serenity of my mind. It is nothing new to me. I often lose the tranquility of my mind. By now, I know, the world is not exactly for me. It is hypocritical, cynical, and fake enough. Or, probably, I am the unlucky one not to see the sunflower side of the earth and people yet to make myself believe that the world is actually for me. Nah, I never blame the world actually. I believe in the proverb: survival for the fittest. So, if I feel it difficult to survive, it is me the misfit, or unfit. I have yet to learn to establish me on earth without losing my ethics, or without compromising badly with what seems to me the hypocritical things. I have yet to learn to ignore the situations that hurts me.
It is not that I do not understand reality well. I do understand. And I am always ready to face the reality. I do know that good, and bad prevail on earth intertwined. I do know that everybody risks the prick of thorn for a rose. I am no exception. I am no privileged, or pampered. So, ya, it is not me alone in the crisis. There is lot out there who are feeling the same, who are seeing themselves misfit like me as at times we fail to coup up with the world opposite to our mentality.
No, I am not pacifying myself. I am analyzing the situations. I am trying to see things rationally, and logically, so that my thought of being a misfit will not make me a total failure on earth. I do not want to be a loser. All I want is to conquer the earth with courage, and vitality. Having a vicious, irritating, disgusting, hypocritical opposites does not mean the end of the life. To value more the goodness I adore, I need to face the bad. It is OK. In fact, it is life. Getting hurt, or depressed is not a solution. Rather, it is a waste of time, and energy. And in other way, it is actually nurturing the negative feelings too!
Yes! I am convinced! I am not the misfit. I am the fittest, instead. I have overcome the sorrow, the depression, the pain. I am feeling much better. My mind is no more restless now. On the spur of sad moments, I forgot the other half of this binary world. I forgot that nothing exists singularly. If bad things are out there to hurt me, also courage, and hope are there to fight with those. Yeah! I am a courageous girl. Writing up this I have taken time to realize the situation. Also, discovered that getting engaged with positive activities, like writing, reading, or watching movie, or whatever, actually helps to get out of the negative feelings.
The whole write-up is of course a way of helping myself to get out of the depression. But if it helps my readers in anyway I will be feeling extremely good. Wishing everyone a hassle free life, though life would be boring without hassles!